ahka | Not Our Kids--the conference part 1 (Reply)

The conference was great. I was glad I went. In addition to free 5 CEUs I got very good information and was inspired by a few sessions and especially a theatrical production presented by 3 teenagers that is called Disordered [thy name is teenager] .

I met a few people I know from my internship. The conference started with a keynote speakers, a mother and her children who were sharing their journey with Bi-Polar disorder of her oldest daughter.

The daughter is 21 now and openly talks about her experiences with issues, treatments and various diagnosis that she had until she got diagnosed with bi-polar and started getting right medications. The story actually sounded to me more like she has an Asperger’s syndrome with ADD but apparently it was bipolar. I have heard other stories and each person experiences it differently.

This girl’s mother discussed how her 1^st born was behaving and as a new parent she had no clue if things were right or not. Some of the earlier signs that something was wrong was when the girl had tantrums, no one and nothing could have stopped her for hours!!! As her brother was born, she was 3 and became very aggressive with no feelings of compassion. The brother was also there and talked about his experience with his sister that one day she would fight and the other day would hug and annoy him. Her changing moods impacted the whole family, on the daily basis no one knew what each day or each hour will bring. Also, mother learned that girl could not stay on task. Of course, once she started school problems continued and escalated, teachers were not happy and she was referred to be checked by psychiatrist.

There were a lot of other details but what stood up for me was her discussion of various treatments when she was a child. She was in play therapy and didn’t see value in treatment but only she loved to go to that place and play with a lot of fun toys for an hour. She still does not understand the meaning of that treatment. She said that her therapist just asked her how is school, she would answer her in one word and just quietly play.

All of the information that I read about play therapy focuses only on child expressing what’s on his/her mind while playing. Toys are very expressive and it is child’s language. Some books explained that play therapist must teach child what feelings associate with the play thus teaching them to be aware of the feelings. Yet, in my sessions with kids in addition to just expression and feelings I tried to incorporate some self esteem boost or some positive non judgmental lesson and praise. The literature does show that there has been done a lot of research about play therapy and effectiveness of it. I don't know, do I want to argue it otherwise?

Anyway, let me move along. The next session I picked to attend was about ADD/ADHD. It was a great session where parents of kids with ADD/ADHD shared their stories with us and the presenter. The presenter made a lot of very good points about the overdiognosis and underdiognosis of this disorder. She actually indicated that this disorder should be renamed to Inconsistent Motivation Disorder because usually people diagnosed with ADHD are not paying attention and not focused when they are not motivated, however once they are motivated and interested they can do very well.

She explained that parents must find a very good experienced psychiatrist and psychologists that would do a lot of different tests and observations across all areas of child’s life to give a correct diagnosis. First of all, all medical and developmental problems and allergies must be ruled out, then anxiety, depression and learning disabilities should be ruled out.

To diagnose a child, it has to be clear that child suffers. She is not in favor for medication but if child suffers, medication can help child focus better and function better. She suggested that parents must attend some trainings and take breaks from their kids. Social skills trainings usually helpful. Psychotherapy would not help with ADHD but can help deal with the issues that occur because of ADHD. Coaches or mentors are significant help for individuals who suffer from ADD/ADHD.

She said that there was found that many children are allergic to Red#2 that is often added to foods and even Benadryl medication have paradoxical reactions.

As I have studied this stuff before and now refreshed my mind, I started thinking about Mishka and even myself. It is a biological disorder, yet, as people get older they learn to manage it better. After I enrolled in grad school, my brain totally changed and I became more focused and started to comprehend better when I read unlike when I was younger. My memory got better too!!! I never thought that I could memorize as much as I could while in grad school and now. However, it applies only to things I am interested in. If I am not interested, I can listen and would not even understand what it’s all about. Don’t we all have Inconsistent Motivation Disorder??? + bipolar when we are energetic and high about an idea and later after a while feeling low and depressed. Yes, we all experience this but what is the volume of it? Does it negatively impact our everyday life? If yes, we need help, if we can make it by, then we are OK.

I will write separately about the next 3 sessions that I attended. There was a session about How to teach our kids to be happy and How to keep bullies out of our minds. The third was not a session but a theatrical performance, very powerful about mental disorders and teenagers. Very educational!!! Very brilliant and touching.